Transitions in Marriage; In-Law Relations

"Therefor shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife."

-Genesis 2:24

Creating relationships with in laws can be tricky but also very rewarding. It can be a challenge to mesh two different people together who have had different family traditions and to let go of our parents in a sense to find a new identity as a couple. My husband and I live in the same town as our parents. We even live just a few streets over from my parents. We are blessed to have family so near and to have our children’s grandparents close by. We honestly love it. But there have been times when parents have crowded us with spending too much time at our home. But for the most part they have allowed us to make our own choices and giving advice when asked. We have been fortunate enough to be able to grow as an individual couple and family while also remaining close with our families. Holidays can be tricky especially when dividing time and choosing which traditions to incorporate into our family. We remind ourselves that we are blending our traditions and not picking and choosing which ones are better than others. Relationships with our in laws have also been fortunately pretty easy for us. Both of our families have been accepting and loving right away from the beginning. The one thing for me that can be a challenge is that my husband’s parents speak Spanish as their primary language. They speak English but not very much and when the family is together, they naturally speak Spanish. My mother in law doesn’t speak English as easily. My Spanish is not very good; I only know a few phrases and words. To bridge this gap we make sure we spend time together and show our love through our actions. We smile at each other, hug, we help each other with meals, and other little things. Spending time with one another and voluntarily helps us overcome the language barrier we sometimes have. We don’t let the barrier keep us from spending time together. Our families have been great and have helped us grow as a couple. We strive to be equally close with both sides and even do things together as a big group with both families present. That has helped us feel like we are blending families and as the reading said the families complement each other instead of competing with each other.